7 Great Ways to Boost Your Confidence
I go through these hills and valleys of confidence and self-consciousness, but overall I would say that I am confident in who I am. It wasn’t always like this, of course. Middle and High School are tough places, especially for quiet, shy girls with braces who are into Harry Potter, Batman, and reading. Despite playing varsity sports and being in all honors classes, I was never really popular – I never went to parties, I stayed away from drinking, and I definitely didn’t date. That is just who I was.
How Relationships Can Affect Your Confidence
Until my senior year of high school – the year I become “pretty”. I use this term because it is all subjective, and conventional beauty doesn’t hold a candle to the beauty of the soul. However, for High Schoolers, this mattered. I don’t find that I am top notch gorgeous, but I was definitely cute. The energy that started buzzing around me changed me, and changed my outlook on life.
Then, my first boyfriend in college knocked me down. When we first started dating, I was “beautiful” and “gorgeous” and he treated me like the sun was shining out of my ass – but that didn’t last. You see, when you date someone who outright tells you he is a sociopath who cannot love – believe him. He would compare me to other girls, made it obvious that he preferred bigger breasts than mine, and let me know how much he loved blondes (I was and am a brunette). And then he dumped me – well, I broke up with him to let him go, and he didn’t come back. How could I make him stay with me when he literally told me “The room just doesn’t light up like a Christmas tree when you walk into the room anymore” and “I can never love”?
Long story short, we went through this for about a year and a half and I was dealing with my old eating disorder and feelings of inadequacy. It’s funny because after it was all said and done, I took him on as a best friend and helped him through his own tough times. Sometimes people are cold and mean because they have nothing.
It took me too long to realize that I should never value myself worth and confidence on a relationship. I had to relearn to be myself, to be confident in who I was – to love myself. It was a hard journey, but I’ve managed to make it through.
7 Tips and Tricks to Boost Your Confidence Daily
- Get to Know Yourself – Sometimes a lack of confidence comes from feeling lost in your life. You don’t know or remember who you are, and this causes you to feel like your self worth is less than your peers.
- Clean Up – This is not something I have had trouble with personally, but some people I know have struggled with this point. Depression can hinder one’s motivation to do even the most basic of tasks, and for that I would suggest seeking professional help. However, for those of us who are just feeling down, getting into a great hygiene routine can help boost your confidence. Brush your teeth 2-3 times a day, shower daily, and wash your hair and face as recommended. Brushing your hair and wearing deodorant are highly recommended as well.
- Dress to Impress – Yourself. If you’re wearing sweatpants, baggy clothes, or PJs all day, you might be feeling a little self-conscious about how you appear. In many ways, the way you dress can impact how you feel about yourself. Working from home, I can sometimes fall into the rut of just wearing my PJs all day – but I try not to most days. Putting on clothes like I am going to work, or putting on workout clothes motivates me to feel confident and also gives me the energy to leave the house when the workday is done.
- Pump Up the Jam – According to research from a 2014 study, listening to some of your favorite tunes can actually boost your happiness and confidence. So pop in those AirPods and get your body rocking!
- Get Your Blood Flowing – It is no question that exercising and getting your blood circulating works to improve your mood and confidence. To be clear, you cannot work out just once and expect it to have an immediate effect. Studies show that routinely exercising can lower stress and boost your confidence. So overall, you are making yourself healthier both mentally and physically!
- Accept That You are Not Your Peers – I mention this one a lot in my blog posts because this is so true – you are NOT your peers! Even if life seems to be going perfect for them, such as getting their dream job, traveling the world, or taking the next step with their partner, you need to understand that they are not you. You cannot compare your “short-comings” to their successes – and remember, people only show you what they want you to see.
- Focus on Your Personal Growth – If you have a dream, don’t be afraid to take steps to pursue it. You only have one life to live and you might as well work to get what you want out of it. Wasting your time on a job you hate, or studying for a degree you don’t want will not do you or your confidence any favors. But also understand that pursuing your passion will take hard work.
What are some tips you use on a daily basis? Please share in the comment section below. Need advice? Ask me anything here! See you soon!
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